Holy Fire by Alex Grey |
*note: If you are interested in learning more about meditation and somatic spirituality, check out my book, Finding God in the Body: A Spiritual Path for the Modern West. It draws from a variety of different traditions—including Buddhism, contemplative Christianity, Judaism, and 12 Step spirituality—to present, not a smorgasbord, but a synthesized path and actionable structure that resonates with the modern Western mind. Click here to learn more about Finding God in the Body: A Spiritual Path for the Modern West.
"Do you not realize that your body is the temple?"
con·tem·pla·tion— that which is done in the temple.
The body is a place many of us have not been for quite some
time. We have forgotten our bodies. In our modern world,
the sensitivity and immediacy of the body is treated like a nuisance.
It is almost as if the body is always interrupting the head, with it’s plans
and strategies. With our ambitious heads in the driver’s seat, we push our
bodies to the edge. As a result, we are plagued by aches and pains, fatigue,
addiction, and illness. We seek escape from the prophetic wisdom of intuition,
but the persistence of this wisdom reveals our plans and strategies to be
a cowardly exercise in futility—preordained tendencies that seek to escape
the inevitable reunion of mind and body.
Then, in an act of desperation, we drown out the
realization that we are seeking escape. We begin to chase oblivion, and in the
process, we silence the voice of our body. We go numb. The impending
reminders of our corporeal condition are, often times, so extreme and
overwhelming that the body has come to be regarded as a burden. At best,
most of us see the body as a bag of bones, which chauffeurs around the tyrant
lodged between our ears. This condition is referred to as “disembodiment.”
Inbred thinking is the origin of our disembodied condition.
A decapitated head is an industrious mentality characterized by confusion,
speed, and clutter. In short, it is insane. When thought is divorced from
reality, consciousness becomes infected with insanity. In a disconnected mind
thought is forced to supply itself with content, which is the origin of
insanity.
At birth we are fully embodied. As a matter of fact, we are
still fully embodied; we are just ignore-ant of this fact. As we
begin our initiation into the human race, we inherit a program that
seeks to fragment awareness for the sake of organization. The true nature
of thought is pure energy, but language begins to interpret this energy,
molding it through a process of conformity. Eventually, the thinking mind is governed by
a pre-ordained system of dynamics and unquestioned assumptions.
Language itself is not a problem. There is an organic need
for language—some means by which to express insights, ideas, needs, and
concerns with those around us. It is a medium through which we can relate
our experience to others. Simply put, experience is not subservient
to language. Rather, language is an attendant to thought. So long as
we understand the transparent nature of language, it is not a problem. However,
few of us are let onto the relative nature of language. So, thought ends up
conforming to the grammatical dictates of the system installed.
In our infancy, both as a species and as an individual,
thought was simple and precise. But it was an ineffective medium for
communicating our experience. In the primitive condition, thought does not
operate within the context of discernible and widely accepted terms
or cultural paradigms. So, we are forced to develop our capacity to
communicate with others. This was often prompted by our parents saying, “Use
your words!” This begins a frustrating process of communicating our
rich and textured experience using vague and lifeless terms. It is a
violent procedure where the integrity of the human experience is
replaced with the nebulous and imprecise world of words and concepts.
Through repetition, thought conforms to the governing
dynamics of language. The most fundamental syntactic rule being
the completion of a grammatical unit consisting of one or
more words. Simply put, how to complete a sentence. We learn that in
order to complete a simple sentence a subject needs to be verbing with an object. Over time
the movement of thought becomes defined by these dynamics. Now, in order
to form a complete thought, there must be separation between the subject and
object and interaction between the two. The richness and simplicity of oneness
is substituted for confusion and paranoia of duality.
Everything is seen from the point of view of the subject,
that is, the I or the head. This installs a degree of separation
between the head and body. Furthermore, it forces the subject to exert it’s
will over the object, in this case, the head seeks to control the body. This is
the most fundamental form of disembodiment. This ancient division between head
and body—disembodiment—is at the root of all our dissatisfaction.
When we think of a body, we generally think in terms of
legs, eyes, a liver, so on-&-so forth. However, in this instance, the term
body is referring to the gateway through which we interact
with reality. Our relationship with reality is ambiguous, because the
lines which separate us and reality are non-existent. But we believe in this
fundamental distinction. So, we pretend. In truth, we are a vessel through
which reality expresses itself. This vessel is the body and it is
wisdom-awareness. By wisdom-awareness I do not mean some kind of “fru-fru
new-agey non-sense.” Wisdom-awareness is a term that refers to the
immediacy and precision of knowing. It is not the intellectual capacity to
know about something. Wisdom-awareness is knowing. It is
the difference between knowing about ice-cream and tasting it.
Wisdom-awareness is the ground of experience. In other words, Life
expresses itself through the body, because the body is Life. What we call Life
is made known through the body.
It is through the eyes that images arise. The nose collects
aromatic energy, the ears auditory information, the nerve endings all over the
body reveal tactile sensations, and the tongue tastes the world. But
the body is not the ears, eyes, nose, tongue, or nerve endings. The body
is the knowing. Most people think that human beings are intelligent because they
can measure and manipulate the temperature of a room.
However, real intelligence is to be found in our capacity to
reflect the hotness or coldness of a room. Wisdom is the capacity to
be hot or cold. The body is this wisdom. It is
a unified field of experience. It is the hearing, tasting, feeling,
seeing, and smelling—free of observer and observed. It is pure
observation. It is not the process of thinking about the body or
atmosphere. It is subtle awareness, devoid of interaction between a
subject and object. The body is pure experience which precedes any
notion of subject or object. It is experience without beginning or end.
I did not include thinking in the list above,
not because thinking is other than the body, but because some
clarification is needed in regards to the experience of thought. Thinking is an
interesting phenomena. Few people ever question the nature of thought. So, it
is necessary to distinguish between somatic and subjective thought.
Subjective thought refers to the content and value of what is
being thought, as it relates to the previous thought. It has to do with the
underlying story as it pertains to the central character, the ego. This is
inbred thinking. Here, inbred refers to the self-conscious tendency to think
about thoughts. This process of cognitive inbreeding muffles the precision and
clarity of original thought, as thought becomes further and further removed
from inspiration or direct experience. In point of fact, this is the systematic
suppression of one’s own creative capacities. Furthermore, it solidifies the
experience of a solid-separate self or the personification of thought, as it
validates the belief that there is a thinker—“I think, therefore I am.”
The
personification of thought is called the ego. “I” is the common
denominator in all thought. When thought works within the context of the
grammatical formula, “I” is the only constant prerequisite for
the completion of a given thought. “I” is the subject of every thought.
So, “I” is installed as the central character in the drama that is
Life. This is the subjective or ego-centric experience. Within the subjective
experience, each thought is a reaction to the previous thought. In other words,
this thought was inspired by it’s predecessor and will go on to
influence it’s successor. This is the karmic equation: Within a dualistic
situation there will always be cause and effect. Every act will produce an
effect. This effect will always be similar in nature to the cause that set it
in motion. Furthermore, every effect will become a cause. Since the
common denominator in all of these thoughts is “I,” an obsession or pattern of
thought begins to revolve around this sense of self, which is then
shaped by it’s interactions with the objects in it’s environment.
So our self-image becomes an uber-concept, and it is this
concept that serves as the metric system that establishes the value of all
other experiences. This is why those who affect us in a positive way are
considered friends, those who affect us in a negative way are considered
enemies, and the majority of faces, which have no direct affect on us, are
considered insignificant. The worth of a person, place, or thing is judged on
the basis of how it affects this sense of self, and that is the definition of
self-centeredness.
This is where things get interesting. In reality, thinking
is just the memory in motion. So the content of thought is limited to the
repository of information in the memory. But when thought is inbred, this
repository becomes limited, because we have ignored most information, as it had
no direct impact on our personal situation. In other words, a
self-centered mind is a closed mind. This dynamic renders
thought impotent or insane, as it reduces the primary influence of each thought
to the few instances where we have been hurt or the hand full of times our
expectations were met. So, the way the world should and shouldn’t be is
defined by the instances in our past when we were disappointed or validated.
Basically, the world is revolving around an expired idea, which is little more
than personified insecurity. This
creates a cycle where thought repeatedly validates and confirms it’s own
preconceived fears and expectations, by issuing habitual responses that produce
situations that resemble the insecurity, which set this whole process in motion
in the first place. This reduces the entire spectrum of experience—the
infinite number of possibilities provided by the spacious quality of the
present moment—down to a select few, which placate our fears and expectations.
We live in a bubble of insecurity.
Somatic thought is the natural, earthly sensation that is
thought. It is the raw, un-interpreted physical event which precedes
all concepts, characters, plots, motives, and story-lines. This
dynamic energy is wealthy. The first thought is always full or complete. It is
the uncreated energy which has been set in motion by a direct experience of
reality. It is sanity. Somatic thought is pure or untainted. There is no
elaboration or unnatural additives. The first thought is always pristine, and
from the point of view of simple observation every thought is a first thought.
Somatic thought is a dimension of reality. Therefore, it is
always operable. It gets twisted when a second thought comes along and clings
to the first thought, generating an opinion about the first thought. This is
second hand knowledge, but it doesn’t stop there. A third thought comes along
and elaborates on this opinion. This process continues indefinitely. This
is the great migration from the body to the head, and the process by which we
replaced clarity and precision with second hand knowledge.
Somatic thought is a dimension of the body. The subjective
experience exists, but as an illusion. We live in an illusion. As thought
obsesses over itself, it ignores the body. As a result, we have misplaced the
body. We have forgotten what it means to be fully human.
You might be asking yourself, “Why is this important?” Well,
one day I was walking my dog. We came to a stop sign and I thought, “I am
hungry.” This was interesting to me, because I had just eaten dinner. So, I
investigated the sensation. What I found was a psychological craving and not a
physical hunger. I wanted sugar, not food. However, since I was stuck in my
head the whole experience was violently conceptualized, and in the process the
body was ignored. Essentially, thought recognized a craving for something
sweet. Since sweets are edible, this craving met the criteria for the concept,
“hungry.” However, when I checked with my body it did not confirm the
suggestion that I was hungry. In fact, it said, “We have had plenty to eat.” A
great deal of the experience was shaved off so that it could be
compartmentalized.
So why is all this important? Think about how many
times a day people eat food because they want sugar, but in their head believe
that they are hungry…
Reggie
Ray once said, “”Every single habitual pattern has been developed in
relationship to an experience that was intolerable for us.” So, to put
the matter in a more practical focus… When something happens within the course
of our daily lives that reminds us of one of these intolerable experiences we
issue a habitual response. This response is meant to subdue the situation, and
prevent the disagreeable event from repeating itself. These habitual
responses are the left-handed expression of our insecurities. From
either the point of view of fear or expectation, these habitual responses cater
to our insecurities. They seek to create a world that avoids our fears by
conforming to our expectations. Now, like I mentioned earlier,
these insecurities are incubated in the memory, and sustained through
an insane dynamic of inbred thinking. Inbred thinking never allows these
insecurities to breathe. They never see the light of day, because we never move
past the habitual patterns that entomb them. We get hooked in the story line.
So, we hang on to them, and after a while our mind is cluttered. Eventually,
there is so much junk in our heads that the experience of life becomes
claustrophobic. It gets to a point where everything seems to press our buttons.
This is an unsustainable situation.
So imagine for a moment, letting go of the habitual
response. By letting go, I mean, not suppressing the insecurity or acting
it out. Simply observe it. Sit with it. What would you find? If you were
willing to move beyond the habitual response into the insecurity and sit with
it, you would see that memories are dynamic. They are not just words, sounds,
and images. Memories have texture. Emotions are imprinted on our memories. But
when you look closer, you realize that there is something dull or expired about
the experience of resentment or re-sent information. So you look
deeper. Then you see it.
What you thought was an emotional response to your current
predicament was, in fact, just a memory imprinted with an emotional charge.
Your current situation resembled an experience from your past, which through
the process of association set this memory in motion. Since the memory is of a
traumatic experience it has texture, but because of
our disembodied condition we relate to what we think about the
experience (inbred thinking), instead of the experience itself (basic
awareness). The inbred mind is stuck in the past. Therefore, it is stale and
musty. While, basic awareness is inspired by the present moment. So, it is
fresh and clear. If we do not investigate the quality and source of our experience,
we fail to realize that the “negative emotion” is just the texture a memory.
Resentment is an emotionally charged memory from the past, not a
direct experience of the present moment. The moment we realize this, we are
right back in the present moment, because we have had a direct experience of
thought.
This is not to say that there is no genuine emotion. There
is, but it is un-interpreted. It is raw energy. The experience of genuine
emotion is whole or complete; in need of no justification or excuse.
Far too big to be shoved into some conceptual pigeonhole. “Genuine anger”
does not have to be explained away with blame or justified by excuses.
Pure emotion is not apologetic, because it is not a symptom of insecurity, but
an expression of the enlightened mind.
Unfortunately, few of us ever cut through the story-lines
and habitual responses that revolve around our insecurities. Instead, of
focusing on the button, we turn our attention towards the bastard that pressed
the button. So, we project or blame the sensation on the situation. This
is a symptom of our disembodiment. When we took up residence in our head,
we disconnected from any sort of genuine emotional life.
Touch The Earth.
The spiritual path is not about rejecting the body
or suppressing thought. It is about the observation of confusion. The
most fundamental misunderstanding is the belief in the separation between mind
and body. In simple observation, we realize that the head is an aspect of the
body. It is not the task of the head to govern the body, nor is it the job of
the body to control the head. The two are not separate. The human body is a
multi-dimensional manifestation of awareness, which includes the thinking mind.
If we push through the relative experience of subjective
thought and reconnect with our bodies—the unquestionable experience of basic
awareness that manifests as a bouquet of aromas, forms, textures, flavors,
melodies, emotions, and thoughts —we will rediscover a spacious environment
that facilitates the spontaneous expression of
basic intelligence. That is, a basic experience free of division,
therefore devoid of conflict. All forms of division are but a symptom of the
principle division between mind and body. This division is a side effect of a
misunderstanding, namely the belief in a conceptual-self localized in
the dome of our skull. Reconcile that division in the singularity of basic
awareness, and watch as the network of thought that establishes dissatisfaction
come tumbling down like a house of cards. The practice of meditation or
contemplation is the path of reconciliation. In the practice of meditation
we reconnect with our body. We touch the earth.
Click here to read Faith, Meditation, & the Body.
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Click here to read Faith, Meditation, & the Body.
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